Refuse To Worry

Refuse to worry.

Absolutely.

Emphatically.

Whole-heartedly.

Worry is like shouting at the universe, “I don’t trust you.” “You don’t want what’s best for me.” The divine power that rules the cosmos is love itself and always wants what’s best for you. However, that might not be what’s easiest for you. Face it. When we regard our own situation, we tend to want what’s easy, not necessarily what will result in the most growth, the most expansion, the most opening to possibilities we hadn’t even allowed ourselves to consider. That’s ok. Our view is limited. We’re human. Fortunately there is a force greater than our narrow horizons.

There is a saying that worry is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do but it doesn’t get you anywhere. So true. Just because you don’t know at this moment how something is going to turn out doesn’t mean you have to obsess about it. Look back at all the things that you have worried about before. Did they turn out as badly as you anticipated? Probably not. And even if they did, were you able to find a way to deal with the worst case scenario? Of course you were. Because you’re still here. Worrying.

Don’t confuse worry with concern. Concern for the child, for the outcome, for the friend who is ill, these are legitimate feelings of care and compassion for those sharing this journey in the whirlwind. But worry? Worry is being stuck on the “what if” merry-go-round. There is no stopping; no conclusion. There is only the next thing to worry about, the next "up" only to be plunged into the next "down." And that is self-torture at its finest.

So then the inevitable question becomes, “How do I stop?” For me, the first thing is simply a mental, “Stop it!" This may sound crazy or foolish, but sometimes it helps to hear a voice stating the obvious. Staying on the merry-go-round is a choice, and we can choose to get off. Another option: Take worry to the nth degree. Keep imagining the worst and what that might bring about. And then the worst possibility after that. And after that. Do you really think all of those horrible things are going to happen? And even if they do, aren’t there all sorts of options along the way? People may appear who want to help, circumstances may change, surprises might occur. Worry is a series of what ifs. But here’s the thing: the what ifs are always negative. Try playing the “what if” game filling in the blanks only with positives. Your subconscious will most likely fight you and immediately tell you that you’re being ridiculous. All of those good things are never going to happen to you. Yet you were more than willing to believe all the negative things might happen. It really doesn’t take too much time on this planet to fall into this self-defeating trap. This is because the bad stuff stands out so clearly. It’s so easy to recognize. But even that is all perception. Often we determine something is bad just because what happened isn’t what we thought we wanted to have happen. So if we simply shift our awareness from “This is bad,” to “Maybe this will lead me to where I want to be; I just didn’t think of taking this route,” we leave the door ajar for the magical to enter. Magic is full of improbable possibilities. And possibilities are far more exciting than the worry-go-round.